When it doesn't work


I have two options now: I can either sit down and be depressed –current state- about the big failure I am and how I ruin everything I touch, or I can just move on. Now, if this whole thing happened before, what if moving on is not the answer? What if maybe the only answer is giving up, or loose out dreams, or maybe deny ourselves completely?
Not only it's raining in LA but also in my mind and soul. My hopes are down to a point that nothing can make it better. Yes, I love to punish myself and this is why: some people don’t have to do anything to be successful, some people even do the “wrong things” and get away with what they want, and some other people, like myself, are born in a third world country, from a middle-going-low-class family and have to work while in College. This would be a little better if it was it, but not the case. We have to add the work world, or the real world. That one that most of American College students won’t experience until older and the one that I had to taste at a young age: responsibilities, adulthood.
I have come across people at my jobs that never worked and got to be supervisors. Instead, this person talking to you would ever worry about making my best job and such worrying would lead to stress and I would never accomplish anything, which led to more stress and depression. None of my jobs really ended well. As a matter of fact, I would leave flaming the flag of freedom to their faces for everything I’ve gone through. I can never rescue anything. And it’s not completely my fault, let’s say I’m not one of those who put up with prejudice, mistreat, disrespect and attitude problems. I’m not completely think skinned so I would always put my dignity first.

Pictures drawn by Miss Capricho

No comments: